Transcribed by Anne Holdorph.
2nd Southampton’s Own
BAINES & OWENS
5 Hight [sic] Street
The Complete SCOUT OUTFITTERS (By appointment)
All goods stocked by us are correct regulation.
A few leading lines selected
Price list on application
PAGE 1: Sectional Gossip
PAGES 2,3,+ 4:Serial
“: 4+5: Adventures in India
“: 6.7.8+9″ Merry Moments
PAGE 10: Troop Orders and Notices
“ 11:Adventures in India (Contd)
“ 12:Troop and Patrol Colours
“ 13: Boxing
“’s 15/16 17:Adventures in India (Cont’d)
Our next patrol is the Beavers and it is a fairly good patrol altogether. The leader (V. House) is a fine Scout having a second grade all-round cord + a medal for boxing. A fine swimmer in fact a top hole scout. “Ginger” is inclined to be humourous at times. His second (Macdonald) is a decent chap with fairy feet. “Never let your braces dangle” is the song of James.
FARMER NAPPER’S TREASURE
(By Rupert Chesterton)
FOR NEW READERS :- Farmer Napper is in trouble he is in his landlord’s debt. He gives Tom Saxby (the young Scoutmaster of the Torrington Troop) some books. Now read on.
“Step in an’ welcome” replied the farmer, and side by side they went across the yard to the ancient red-tiled farmhouse, where sweet faced Mrs Napper welcomed the young Scoutmaster warmly. “Mr Napper has been telling me about your trouble” said Tom “I need not say how sorry I am. If the squire wasn’t so far away I’d write to him about the matter. I’m sure he would do something to help you.” The old lady’s eyes grew misty with tears. “Don’t talk about it sir” she said “It’s breaking both our hearts. What we do I daren’t think.” She chocked back a sob + then continued “But you’ve come to see those books. Here they are” + she dragged forth an ancient box,
“Very dirty you’ll find ‘em I expect sir + I don’t suppose they’re any good but they must be very old. We never knew there was a cupboard there till the builder’s men pulled down the old partition. Eagerly he examined the volumes. He had the making of a book lover in him + only lack of mean prevented him from going in for the purchase of first editions.” There was only half a dozen musty old volumes in the box, damp, dusty and mildewed. The farmer and his wife watched him smilingly as he lifted them carefully out. One book, a heavy 4 to, inscribed :History of Loamshire 1801” seemed to have its leaves + covers stuck in a solid mass, and Tom laid it down + passed on to the others. “A Voyage round the World”, “Farmer’s Year Book 1812”, “Dr Brook’s Sermons” + a couple of old History books. “Any use to you zir [sic]?” enquired Napper”
“or shall we burn em” I’ll take ‘em away and have a look at them if you don’t mind” said Tom, “This county history might be good if I can’t get it unfastened. Look here exchange is no robbery; you take these hares + I’ll take the books”. “Oh no sir! Don’t give those fine ‘ares for this ‘ere rubbish I wouldn’t ‘ear of it” said Mr Napper but Tom had his way and went off with his books in a parcel. As he passed out of the doorway he saw the troubled look return to the old lady’s face and he gave her a last few words of comfort. “Don’t lose heart yet Mrs Napper” he told her “I’m going to see if there isn’t some way in which I can help you. You’re going to stop here so make up your mind for that.” (to be continued)
THE NORTH WEST FRONTIER OF INDIA
TO READERS :- I am endeavouring to do my best + place before you a description of the north west frontier of India. The fighting experiences I will deal with later after my explanation of the centre of the frontier activities known as the Khyber Pass. II. There is no need to go into exact details so I will commence my narrative at the “Aldershot” of India :- Rawal-Pindi. R. Pindi is an important military cantonment or station in the N.W. province. This city is what we might call the main base to the recent Afgham War of 1919 + has a population of 100.000, mostly Muhammadans + is the starting place for Kashmir + Murree Hills. It is 7,500 ft above sea level. It has a large native bazaar, several temples + is a great railway terminus for the North West Railway. We must leave Rawal Pindi and take train for Peshawar 60 miles north west. The country we pass is uninteresting + villages of mud huts scattered over the plains + mountains do not appeal to us. On the way we pass the celebrated Fort Attock, 45 miles from Rawal Pindi. Fort Attock is a very hot station during the [MISSING LINE FROM SCAN]
Answers to last months riddles
- A dead one
- As much wood as a woodpecker could peck if a woodpecker could peck wood
Scouts should always keep their eyes open, Why?
P.L to Tenderfoot – “I say what is your favourite study?”
Tenderfoot – “Anthropology”
P.L. “But they don’t teach you that in school?”
Tenderfoot – “I know that’s why I like it”
ARTICLES ON THE PATROL CUP
It is my humble opinion that the Bulls have had the cup long enough so let us all form an alliance
against them and work hard to beat ‘em
What is it that is as round as a hoop, as deep as a cup and yet all the water in the world will not fill it?
Answer. A sieve
A negro was carrying a turkey with plenty fat and he fell downstairs damaging the turkey. When his Italian boss heard of this he was angry * What did this resemble?
*and dismissed the nigger.
The breaking up of Turkey,
The upsetting of Greece.
The wrath of Italy.
The sacking of Africa.
Voyager :- “I say skipper, why are you stopping.”
Skipper :- “Fog”
Voyager :- “But there is no fog. Why I can see the stars.”
Skipper :- “Yes but we aint going that way unless the boilers bursts”
A FIT ANSWER
Teacher :- “Can anyone tell me what ten plus five is
Teacher :- “Come now Willie. If your father gave your mother ten pounds and then five, what would she have?”
Willie :- “ A fit teacher”
Bob :- Do you know, to tell by looking at a postage stamp we are never going to lose a war?”
Harry :- “No. How’s that?”
Bob :- Cause the King is never on the side that is licked.”
Boy :- Mister, have you been abroad?”
Old Salt. “Yes why?”
Boy “And have you ever had your legs bitten off by sharks?”
Old Salt. “Yes. Thousands of times”
TROOP ORDERS AND NOTICES
Wednesdays 4th, 11th, 18th + 25th
Saturdays 7th, 14th, 21st + 28th
Band Practices 6th, 13th, 20th +27th
Report of New Years Party
Although it is rather late we are going to make a report on the excellent party. We wish to thank all the entertainers + helpers. Its for the bon-bons, they were “tres-bon-bon” some having fairly valuable prizes. Sonner Batt had a “dummy” to keep the little “darlings” mouths closed. We had a good tea and that was the item eh? Miss House gave us a song or two in good style and Leaders House, Bowditch, Batchelor, May + Batt obliged with songs + recitation. Seconds jacks on Boyes + Scout Scagg gave “Macnamara’s” [MISSING LINE FROM SCAN]
A.S.M’s Stubbings and Morgan gave a fine song each entitled “Kelly’s come back” + “Yards of lace”. Scoutmaster Dawkins gave “The green grass grew all round” and was applauded with – “Oh my wat a rotten song.”
The North West Frontier of India (Contd)
On the banks of the famous river Indus. It has seen the passage of the Indus by every conqueror who has invaded India from the north west since the time of Alexander the Great. We have now to reach our destination Peshawar, which is only a few miles away from Attock. Having arrived we are now in the Headquarters of the north west frontier with a population of about 84,000. His is a most important garrison city, guarding the entrance from India to the Khyber Pass. To shorten our narrative I must leave Peshawar + proceed to the pass.
3rd Albion RED AND GREEN
Scoutmaster Mr Cork
4th St. Barnabas RED AND BLUE
PATROL COLOURS AND CRIES
Bat Light Blue and Black. Pitz-Pitz
Bear Brown + Black Booorrr
Beaver Light Blue + Yellow Slap made by Clapping Hands
MEDALS AND RIBBONS
(Scarlet) V.C (Army)
(Blue) V.C. (Navy)
On the 23rd of January a very good friendly match to place [sic] in the clubroom between Patrol Leader F Lerman and P. L. House. A.S.M. Scorey acted as referee + A.S.M House as timekeeper. During the first round House was “Letting rip” and very soon got puffed. His opponent on the other hand was quite cool. Vicky was knocked “groggy” by a punch in the “Adams Apple” and returned in the second round. Whether he loses the boxing medal or championship I cannot say.
[ILLUSTRATION] What the victim looks like after a bout with P. L. F. ORMAN
Well! What is our candid opinion of the Troop “mag?” Do you think it worth continuing + also have we any fine artists who would like to be on the staff? If so let him see P Hewett at the first opportunity. Anyone wishing to contribute short stories, jokes or poetry should do so without delay. It has been decided to form a Missioner Patrol to visit suck boys. Anyone knowing of a sick Scout should report same to P.L. Batchelor.
Editor :- “Did you see that sharp pointed article I put on your seat?”
Sub Ed. “No, what was it?”
Editor “Only a tintack. See the point?”
Sub Ed. “No I feel it now”
Mr “Uncle” Tomlinson has joined the Salvation Army. Well good luck! It I about time P.L. Leal attended bank practice [MISSING LINE FROM SCAN]
Waiter :- “Hungary?”
Diner :- “Yes Seam”
Waiter :- “Alright I’ll Fyi’” (Fead Ye”)
Questions and Answers
What are the unemployed doing in Germany? Ans. Nothing. —— What are the Poles doing in Russia? Ans. Keeping up the Telegraph wires —- What is the differene between a conundrum and two elephants sitting on a bun? Ans. One is a conundrum + the other is a bunundrem (bun under ‘em)
A Storyette by P.L “Ginger”
There was a woman and she had three men lodgers. One time they came home early in the morning at 2 a.m. and she met them just as they were trying to sneak upstairs and this is what she said to them :- “You are a fine pair you three coming home his time of the night at two in the morning. If you want to stop with me you’d better get fresh lodgings. Now you’ve said enough sticking there like three stuffed silent dummies insulting a respectable married widower like me.
On our right we pass a large Hindoo College + nothing more can be seen for miles except the sand + dust so familiar with India + district At last we come to the actual entrance to the pass. The entrance is guarded by a fort. Fort Jumrud. The pass itself is bordered by mountains both sides about 1,500 ft high and is a narrow defile. It has three roads leading strait through to Persia + Afghanistan. One road is for the military + the other is what is termed the caravan road being the lowest of all the caravans are traders from Afghanistan + Persia bringing all kinds of goods by means of camels. The traders themselves generally riding abrabian [sic] ponies. The articles mostly comprises silks, beads, curios, carpets etc. of brilliant colours to be sold on the
markets of India or exchanged for other goods they require. After leaving Fort Jumrad we take the second road above the caravan road + proceed unto the pass. I should have mentioned these roads are situated one above the other. We have now arrived at Fort Ali Musjid situated on the top of a hill run the centre of the pass, the roads leading round + straight on. This is seven miles in the pass + no one is allowed to proceed further on account of the rifle and horse thieves, robbers and wild tribesmen who are continually fighting one another. Now + again they rob the neighbouring villages + the military are called out to punish them + restore order. In my next narrative I will explain the fighting tribes, namely the Pathans, Atrides, Maslido, wizarists + conditions of the fighting giving you incidents of the native regiments + Gurkhas who oppose them on this frontier fighting that has been going on for years. The reasons I will explain n narrative no. 2. By P. J Storey, A.S.M, Later Cprol xxx x xxx
WATCHES FOR SCOUTS
“Big Ben” Pocket Watch 12s/9d
Non Breakable Crystal Watch 12s/9d
RADIOLITE INGERSOLL tells time in the dark 20/-
From H.B. HAMMOND
Jeweller + Watchmaker
2 High Street, Shirley
Scoutmaster A Dawkins
8 Charlton Road